Thursday 12 March 2009

Wanting my/our will, not Yours... I'm so tired...

December 10, 2006

Lord, I pray for the church today, that Your Spirit will be poured out! Oh dear God, we need You so much. We need to break through and throw ourselves before You! We need to truly repent and lay on our faces before You, and be broken before You and seek You!!! Oh dear God, please do this - Your work - in our midst.

Do it in me, Lord, please. I do sense there are things in me that are blocking You. Father God, I am struggling with being submissive to my husband (yes, I am), and also with leaving him in Your hands. I find I am wanting You to hurry up. I am so impatient.... maybe I am having a hard time accepting that Your will may include things that are not "my" will! I long for my kids to turn to You and follow You (and their families) but it seems easier to turn them over to You and accept Your will for them, than to turn my husband over like that. Maybe because I have to live with him, and his choices affect my future! Lord, it is good that I have to turn to You for spiritual companionship and leadership, because it is not "my nature" to turn to You and totally depend on You. Why is it always You that "I" turn to last?? That's the old fleshly sin nature rising up in me, of course! Oh dear God, please take my husband and do Your will, not mine, in his life!

(Is that a problem in our church, too? Do we want our will, not Yours?)

Dear God, I'm so tired again.
I'm going to sleep a bit.

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