Church: no expectations - except You!

June 15, 2008

Wishing for a bit of company… not used to this lack of “Sunday Soup? (have cancelled it due to hubby's unpredictable work schedule)…

Asked hubby how church was today (for him).. he said we should have tried somewhere else…

I don’t mind Abundant Life but don’t feel “tied” to it either – although I do believe it is important to meet regularly with believers… and that having a “core/ home/ church/ family/ body” is really necessary, helpful, and biblical.

June 17, 2008

Father, about the email I got from ___ today… wondering about “our church”… why so many people have left…

Okay, so Lord, I have no idea how to respond… Well the thing
is, I’m doubting any place else will be any more perfect.. and I do have friends there… and I do believe we really need to gather together regularly, as Your Word says… and perhaps “my”problem is that I’m not “involved” enough…

But I don’t want to rush around being “involved” just for the sake of being involved or to look good or enthusiastic or whatever…

Used to be I had ideas of what would make a “great church” (or gathering, or whatever)… and I’ve tried a few things and places…

I’d say that it is good to meet with God’s people – and I’d also say that I sure have found His people in a lot of “gatherings” of different kinds… but it seems like trying to create a gathering in “my” image (my idea of what would be great…) isn’t right….

It seems like You have to be the Center… but we humans keep getting hung up on what pleases, attracts, thrills, whatever – us! me! (Each of us – no wonder we can’t get unity when we don’t have the only possible real Center – You! – at the Center!!)

Seems like we go for whatever it is that we (each of us) is “looking for”- “seeking” — but the “seeker-friendly approach” has been tried… and while it has brought in the numbers, perhaps… it seems to me that the individual “seekers” have become the “centers” – huge number of centers – how can that possibly be? Where is unity? Where does that leave You? It is Your church, isn’t it? It’s about seeking You, coming to know You, worshiping You…

Yes, we are part of the body (important parts, apparently, which does not ever cease to amaze me! Who would have thought You, perfect, complete, holy – would choose to “need” us?!?!)

Yes, our gifts (Your gifts to us, to be used for the edification of the whole body, and for Your glory – Father, Jesus, Holy Spirit – God!) are important; yes, we are to use them – but You know very well that over the years I’ve just become more and more confused and uncertain about what Your gift(s) to me might be…

And then how do I “use” it/them? If I don’t even know what it/them are?

I like making soup for people … but not that many people want to come… and yet the “regulars” (yes, I know, the lonely folks mostly!) have become special to me…

I seem to be able to “teach” or at least be a friendly facilitator of those who would seek to know You more – together…

I seem to be “family” … sister, mom, granny… to some folks who have really become my gal friends… and family friends, with their families…

But You know, maybe these don’t seem like things we do in/ for “church” …

I just don’t want to do those, I don’t know… programmy, system kinds of things… things that “seem” to be “the church” … are they, really?

This is a funny thing… the one thing I think every time I “go to church” … I wish we could just sit on the floor (or chairs for those who need them), in a circle or whatever, where we can see each others faces, and there isn’t a “front” that we focus on, that’s more “important” than the rest of the body…

When I “saw” You in church that Sunday, You were just wandering around through the people, reaching out, smiling, touching… the chairs and neat rows didn’t get in Your way – it was almost as if they didn’t exist – folks were reaching out to You … and to each other, too (that one guy praying for/ with the other one, and ___ running around giving her little hugs, and that tiny native girl going up to complete strangers and just looking up and smiling at them…

Yes, the “worship team” was up there “leading” but it seemed like it was far away in the background, not really “leading” at all – sometimes just fading into the background, other times a line just swelling up in praise and joy and worship and glory to You…

Like that description in The Shack about when everyone came to the meadow – and then You entered – and it was all about You – love and worship reaching out to enfold You – and Your love reaching out and enfolding everyone, every creature – together – and also individually, personally! Time suspended… the joy of being together, worshiping, centered, focused on You, the King of kings, Lord of lords, Creator, Savior – the man who is God, and the God who is man.

And then when that happens we can’t help but love each other too, care for each other, encourage, help, edify, uplift, pray for, support - “They took note that they had been with Jesus!” That is what turned the world upside-down. Not the specific ways they “did church” – but their vital, perfect-in-You, continuous, growing, maturing, worshiping connection with You!!

“First love” …. How easily we are distracted, how easily we forsake – You first.. and then, inevitably, each other… If we are not united in You, we are nothing, have nothing, can do nothing.

(Interesting thought… what if, instead of “altar calls” we were encouraged to turn to each other, and together, reach out to You? - Instead of depending on the prayers of the “pastoral team” and the music of the “worship team” ? What if we really were listening to You, seeking You, hearing You, sharing with each other what You are saying to each of us, spontaneously and joyfully bursting out in song – the songs that best reflect at that moment the joy we have – not just “feel” – in Your Presence, the awe and worship that arises as we know You, receive Your love, love You in return, be in relationship with You… and the love for each other that must inevitably follow if we are genuinely in love with and worshipping, praising, glorifying, knowing You!

We cannot truly serve the body if we are not truly, first and always, loving and serving and worshiping You first.

We cannot be Your body, Your family, united in You, if we split up into our little groups all the time (childrens church, etc) and never see each other except once a week for an hour or so. We cannot be united when some are so clearly more “important” than others (even if it's not "intended" that way). You are our leader. You are our shepherd. You are our pastor. Yes, some do have special gifts of teaching and preaching, and some have known You longer and more deeply… but that needs to be shared in a family gathering where You are at the Center.

We need to let You be in control. Let Your Spirit lead in our gatherings. (If Your Spirit is leading, there will be control, there will be unity – there will not be chaos… chaos is a sure sign someone else is trying to be in control, isn’t it? As is stiffness and ultra-programming…

Why does it matter what time we end? (or start, for that matter?) Why are we so controlling? Why do we want our way? Ah, there it is again… our way, us at the center – not You…

Maybe we just need to go to wherever Your people are gathering… and seek You alone… get our eyes off the things that we don’t like, and get our eyes on You alone… Maybe at first we’d feel “alone” … and yet – alone with You!!! The one place where there is no loneliness at all!!! And maybe if one person here, and another there (or even just one – it has to start somewhere – really, for each of us it has to start with “me’ – purposes to go and focus on You, submit to You, seek You… and respond to You in whatever unique way You created each of us to be… things would start changing… not to “our” preferences – but to Your way, Your love, Your body-life!!!

So maybe leaving isn’t the answer at all. Maybe really becoming united to the body, soaking up Your life, Your Spirit, You! maybe that’s all it takes. So simple. (So why do we make it so hard?) Just rest in You…

Lord, King, God Almighty!

I love You, Lord. Help me to know You, love You, serve You, worship You, glorify You more! Then the rest will fall in line. Won’t it??? Yes!

No expectations – except You!