Christian conferences, and Christian bookstore displays... oh! and thoughts on government

Nov 6/07

Dear Heavenly Father, I was thinking about (and talking about/against – which I should not have) people like “Beth Moore”- to whom You have given “marvelous ministries” – and I was complaining because it looks like their speaking (which is a very Godly message even – at least the one I heard seemed to be) sometimes turns into a “performance” … and then I also thought maybe that’s the only way to reach a “performance-saturated” society (although she, at least, seems to aim for women who already know You – or at least are part of the “Christian culture”(??) which doesn’t mean they really know You, of course…

Anyway, like ___ said, too, they become the center of big displays in the Christian bookstores, and then all the church women are encouraged to spend lots of money to go see her in conferences (when our church is struggling… but maybe the women would get excited and want to draw closer to You… as long as it’s not just “excitement” .. why can’t we get excited – truly – from Your Word and meeting with You in prayer and stuff like that???).

Lord, the king of Assyria (and the king of Babylon, and King Solomon, and…) were used of You for Your purposes… and their hearts grew cold and arrogant and they turned away from You and believed and boasted that they had done it all themselves… O Lord, I don’t know if You want us to attend the Beth Moore (or other) conference, I don’t know if the display of books and videos and knick-knacks at Christian bookstores and churches and stuff are honoring to You... I don’t think so, but I’ve been wrong way to often!!! … but dear God, if it is Your will, then please keep her humble and her heart focused on You and her whole life and ministry totally dependent on Your Spirit…

Lord, I have seen so many ministries RISE!!! … and then FALL…. and how is that honoring to You?? … but it is so easy for us humans to enjoy and even long for that acclaim…. I’m quite sure that is why You have not permitted me to have a “big ministry” because I am so weak and self-centered and longing for recognition and acclaim… O dear God, please do use me… but only in ways that (with Your help, because it seems sure that in no way can I do this myself!!!) with Your Spirit moment-by-moment guiding me and filling me, I will always keep it ALL ABOUT YOU, JESUS, NOT ABOUT ME… I want to DO THINGS YOUR WAY… YOU ALONE ARE GOD, and I must be always, every moment, permanently SURRENDERED TO YOUR WILL. (including if I should go to the Beth Moore thing!)

Lord, it is clear that our society and nation has turned against You… and yet we have in leadership right now some who claim to follow You (and I think they do, so far as they can in a “democratic” system of governing. (Indeed, I have been surprised that they have not only continued this long but seem to be increasing in strength of government in some ways… are You honoring their faithfulness to You, I wonder??

But sometimes I wonder if I should be praying for Your mercy on a nation that accepts – and enshrines as law – so many evils… oh dear God, I pray You, I beseech You! please change our hearts, cut out (oh, that IS how it has to happen, isn’t it … pain! …) our arrogance, our evil hearts, our rebelliousness against You… perhaps, after all, we will need to FALL in order to lift up our eyes, from a position prostrate before You, and cry out to You, in repentance, true repentance that is followed by true action of really following You!

At the top of my journal page it says, “There is no such thing as an ordinary day.” My response is: How can there be an ordinary day, when every day is created by an extraordinary God!!!