June 5, 2005
“All for Jesus, all for Jesus… For it’s only in Your will that I am free.” I want to be free in worship, Lord, free like David, to run and leap and lay my face before You at the altar with no care what other people think, with no limitations on time, with Your people, only following Your move, Your will. I want more, Lord. More of You and less of me. How do I let go? May I? (What about “decently and in order,” Lord?)
June 9, 2005
Laying here praying… praying that prayer of Jabez… Lord, enlarge my territory… Lord, keep me from evil… Lord, give me the old-fashioned prayer power of old-time prayer meetings…
And then I got this powerful picture – and powerful surge in my being, a surge of power and of certainty, an epiphany of knowing this is God’s will and God’s direction and planning and desire and purpose, and that He will do this because it is what He wants, desires, purposes (according to His word), and His strength is sufficient and the enemy cannot stop Him! No matter what!
If we bow before Him both in humility and repentance and begging forgiveness, and at the same time in total expectation that He will do as He says – that He will enlarge our territory even beyond anything we have even seen or imagined before, as we give His Spirit free rein to move not only in us but in our church, camp, community, region, world! God will pour out revival that will turn us upside-down, and then turn our world upside-down as we, His church, step out in His Holy Spirit, Pentecost, Jesus-knowing-and-trusting, Father-asking-and-expecting – and desiring – power!
Oh Lord, enlarge my vision and enlarge Your territory through me!
June 11, 2005
Oh God, I want more. I want greatness – for Your glory. I think that has been a hold-up in Your plans for me. Lord, I do have trouble with my glory vs. Your glory. Oh God, You’d have to supernaturally help me with that too. But of course, “nothing is too difficult for Thee, great and mighty God.”
Lord, I have thought maybe I have a “gift of administration.” But could it be that administration is for me not a gift at all, but perhaps even a curse, in that it seems to be in me a precipice leading to pride, self-confidence, self- responsibility, self-centeredness…
Dear Heavenly Father, I want transformation of my life. Thank You for already transforming my spirit, Lord, through the shed blood of Jesus. And thank You for the things You have taken me through, including this past weekend seminar. Thank You for working to bring my mind and soul into line with the transformation You have wrought in my spirit – the real me, the me that You have prepared to come into Your presence, into relationship with You. Thank You for making me into a “dead man walking.” Oh, dear God, I do want to become an “extreme God-chaser.” I do want to not only witness, but to experience You personally, in an ongoing manner for the rest of my life, until I see You face to face; not only Your anointing, but Your manifest presence. I want to see and experience Your glory, Lord. I want to bring the world to You, Lord – for Your glory! I want to see Your kingdom come!
June 12, 2005
At the end of the altar call time this morning at the church, ______ came up to me and said two words: “Mighty Warrior.” Tears came down my cheeks. I felt a releasing from God, an assurance that He has heard my prayers and that He is going to use me for His purposes in His great ways.
Where is that in Scripture? Oh! Gideon! Judges 6:12 “The LORD is with you, O valiant warrior” (NASB) (KJV “mighty man of valour”; NIV “mighty warrior.”) And that was when Gideon felt that God had abandoned Israel, and that he himself was “the least” in Israel. And he was so afraid that when he obeyed the LORD, to cut down down the Asherah and the Baal altar, he did it at night so he wouldn’t get caught. And yet God called him, “mighty warrior” because God had big plans for him. God knew exactly what He was going to do through weak, fearful little Gideon. And the Spirit of the LORD came upon him and he led 300 men of Israel against the armies of the Midianites and the Amalekites, and the sword of the Lord wrought a great victory for the 300 men armed only with trumpets and pitchers! Oh God, what are You telling me? This is so awesome! Use me, Lord, any way You want. Through me, by Your Spirit, Lord. Amen.