Thursday, 11 May 2017

Deeper with God

(originally journaled February 1, 2017)

As I've been praying about "launching out into the deep" over the past nearly a year (!), I've felt discouraged because I've kept expecting that at some point I'll have some kind of great emotional experience--and I haven't. I've felt gradually more confident that God loves me and has forgiven my wanderings, and because of that, I have a greater (but not overwhelming, because I still have moments of doubt and worry, and questioning) sense of peace.

But this morning I realised God is taking me deeper with Him ... but "deeper" isn't a fuzzy-wuzzy or yippy-yahoo kind of emotional experience. Just like in a human romantic relationship, the initial "thrill" mostly wears off, but as you keep at it "for better, for worse..." you come to know and love and be comfortable and attached more and more. So it is in relationship with Father, Jesus, Holy Spirit--God. There are joyful moments of "delight," even of "thrill," but the deep knowing, acceptance, assurance, love, caring, comfort is really worth so much more.

Thank You! Amen!

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