Thursday, 6 April 2017
Yesterday and this morning, I've been skimming through the My Church Journey blog, starting from the beginning, around 2000, and moving forward (I got to 2008 so far). I was intending just to focus on "prayer" posts. But they are all prayer posts pretty much. (I was hoping to put together my "prayer book" I've been wanting to write for so long).
I am feeling ... I don't know. It seems like sometimes I was so in relationship with God. But other times so dry. How can the latter come after the former?
And sometimes such high hopes and excitement. Followed by (dare I say?) disappointment or at least wondering "Why?"
Yet all along the way, knowing You are there, even when it seemed like I'd wandered so far from You (in different ways at different times).
"Great is thy faithfulness O God my Father / There is no shadow of turning with Thee. / Thou changest not, thy compassions they fail not; / As thou hast been thou forever wilt be. / ... Morning by morning new mercies I see."
Time has passed so quickly. Have I "failed?" Maybe not, after all. Maybe just my plans were not Your plans. You do know best.
Oh! Listen to this! "The most deeply taught Christians are generally those who have been brought into the searching fires of deep soul-anguish. If you have been praying to know more of Christ, do not be surprised if He takes You aside into a desert place, or leads you into a furnace of pain."
Well, that explains a lot!